IIWW needs the Energizer Bunny!

I was sitting on a bench at lunch, talking with a few people. I see IIWW over by his car cussing by the looks of it. He starts walking over to where we are. I ask someone if they wanted to sit. She said no that she was going back inside. Then IIWW walks by her and sits down. She looks at me and mouths “sorry” laughs and leaves (wench lol).

IIWW preceeds to inform me that he left his car lights on. And then tells me the sad story of how he was on his cell phone about a half hour before lunch and its battery went dead. And then he starts rambling on about the fire department. I quit listening by then and am talking to someone else. Guess he likes his own voice.

Well the fire department had a call go out about a hour and half after lunch. He goes running, leaving someone from work on the phone. Tells someone else to hang it up. I am sitting here thinking, how is he going to get there with a dead battery?

I start talking (yes it was a yappy day) to a couple of others here. We are discussing how he could possibly get to the fire station. I volunteered to go out a way so I can see if his car is still there.

I walk in this morning and talk to one of the people from yesterday. I say yep it was there alright. She laughs and we go to the other persons office and tell him. He also laughs and we wonder if he went or just took off to the bar that is close by.

IIWW walks in about that time. We all go to our own offices as he is suppose to help the other guy as soon as he gets in. A couple of hours later I am on my way out for a break and am stopped. The other employee asks if I had heard the spew of the day. I laugh and say no tell me.

Apparently he found someone going that way and got a ride. Imagine that, someone just happening by like that. But alas he was too late. They already had it mostly cleaned up. That is why he couldn’t tell us what the vehicles were.

So she asked about the car. He said he hadn’t left the lights on. He figured someone or someones had messed with his car. He said they all hate him. Hmmm…absolutely true. But, these people he was saying can't even get on the property!

I went to ask him about getting a jump for his car. Knowing what he had already said to the others but he was gone. I knew he was supposed to take this afternoon off but he told his boss he would cancel. Guess the threat to be fired didn’t really work. Apparently his ex-girlfriend was taken to the emergancy room and he had to go see her. Hope he gets a note from the hospital!

DANGER IIWW DANGER

IIWW just received his warning. As I said in my last post IIWW has missed a lot more time than allowed. He has made up some but usually ends up with less than 40 hours a week every week.

That said, he is supposed to be helping another employee get caught up on a project that got dumped on that employee. The project was thee months behind he received it. IIWW’s boss told him to come in early 1 hour everyday and go in and help (so that should be a 45 hour week). That was a month ago. IIWW does come in early, but he is either on his cell phone or the net or god knows what. He certainly isn’t working.

When he does go in and help it is usually for about 20 minutes. Then the cell rings, ok 10 minute conversation. He works at it maybe another 15 – 20 minutes. You guessed it another cell call. At this point he usually goes in his office with the phone call. The other employee figures it is his girlfriend and that he has her call at a specific time so he can go to his office. So now he has worked for 35 – 40 minutes on this project. Not the required hour.

Well the other employee has gotten pretty fed up with this scenario. He writes an email to their boss and explains the situation. IIWW received a phone call late yesterday afternoon from his boss. As you know he didn’t get in until afternoon.

IIWW walks into the other employees office and sits down to do what he is supposed to. IIWW says to the other employee “You emailed the boss didn’t you?” Other employee, “Several times, which time are you talking about?” IIWW says “About me not coming in here in the mornings” The other employee proceeds to tell him yes. IIWW, “Well the boss just told me that the only reason I haven’t been fired is because there is a hiring freeze on. You know this is your fault don’t you? He wouldn’t have called and said that if you hadn’t emailed.” The other employee was thing WTF. He said, “No IIWW it isn’t my fault. I didn’t take a week vacation and never call in. I didn’t put on my timesheets I was here and wasn’t. I don’t forget my card to get in and sign in instead. Didn’t you know the boss could just call and find out? Are you really that stupid?” IIWW says “Just shut the hell up.”

So as we end it, IIWW is sitting in there angry and silent. The other employee tells me how much he is enjoying the silence and is gloating about the warning! Wonder if he will answer his phone today?

Lies, Lies, Everywhere Lies

IIWW has been quiet as of late. But he came out with a couple of good ones today. I swear IIWW has been to court for varies reasons at least 12 times in the past 3 months. This morning was one of them.

This morning and the last three have been for driving without a license and running a red light. Like if you don’t have a license why would you run a red light? Anyway, he calls someone about 11:00am and says he is done and is going to stop at McDonalds and will right in. (1^st lie it is 5 minutes away).

I am at the water fountain when he arrives at noon, he can’t see me. He starts talking to another person about court. I will give you a bit of the conversation. He says “Well I only have to pay a $300.00 fine!” He is really excited about that. She says “I thought you hired a lawyer and was getting off?” (2^nd lie – he said that two weeks ago to all) He said I thought they would give me a public defender today. I don’t think they even have public defender for the county.” Ok, my water bottle is over flowing by now, but I still stand there, gotta hear it. The next statement is one of the two most outrageous I heard today. He continues on “It was the same judge from my custody battle, I think he plays favorites and should be barred.” (Yes, barred, not disbarred.)

She goes on and asks (and yes she is baiting him she knows I am there.) “Well whatever happened with the custody case? You’ve never said.” IIWW said, “Well I had two lawyers, (3^rd lie, he forgot he told us he never had one because it is too much money) but I had to fire them because they didn’t know what they were talking about.” (2^nd most outrageous)

So there I am, could have filled my water bottle at least 4 times still listening. I am leaning down to actually get a drink. IIWW asks this person “Since I got here at noon do I get a lunch at my normal break time or should I just take my break?” (Almost choked on that one) She asks if he is staying and making up the 4 hours he missed. (Has no vacation time left so he has to make it up) He says “No, I thought I would work 3 so it would make it an even 6 I have make up with yesterday.” He walks away. She comes to where I am and we both just shake our heads and laugh.

Disappointment and Caught!

Well first of all iiww really really disappointed me this morning. We have a daily nickel pool going on his lateness. My time was 5 minutes. Well this is where the disappointment comes in. No one won! He was only a minute or two late (still late just not late enough).

Next, I made myself a piece of toast. I brought in an 8 oz tub of margarine that was 3/4 full about 2 - 3 weeks ago. OK, I have had maybe 6 - 7 pieces of toast out of this margarine before this morning. So I put my bread in the toaster and get MY margarine. Open it. There is about 1/4 left. I go and get a marker thinking OK, everyone knows its mine but I didn't mark it. I put my initials on it.

I am working along and hear the toaster. My office is right next to the break room. I get my cup of water and go to nuke it for tea. Really just wanted to see if it was iiww. Low and behold it was. He was just finishing up butter his bagel with my stuff. I say to him, "iiww, that's not community." "Oh, I will replace it." he says. Yeah right what fn ever dude is what I thought.

So, now the margarine is in my office. I will bring toast to finish up tomorrow and I guess have to bring it only when I need it.

This is quite a day!

Iiww is right on the money today. He came to me about 11:00am or so and asked for a ride to a pharmacy/store down the road at lunch time. He needed to get smokes. I told him no as I don't like to leave at lunchtime for varied reasons. So I am sitting in my office and got to wondering why he would have to go there to get them when there is a store not even a 1/2 block away. I had to ask, really I did. The answer I got was "I am broke and I need to use my health and saving card to get them. The card only works at pharmacies." He is given a certain amount of money by the company to offset his high deductible/low cost health insurance. Anyway I start laughing and said "So, you are gonna buy something that is bad for ya with money that is supposed to be used to help you stay health?" He got all red and got up and walked out of his own office! Yep, may day is continuing to be good!

First off let me tell you a bit about idiotboy I work with (iiww). He is 21yrs old, thinks he is gods gift to women (the thought of kissing him is gross as he doesnt bush much..ok there goes my toast), he thinks he is all knowing about the computer but is on the phone with IT at least once a week fixing his. Iiww loves to brag and lie. We believe today is no exception, he called in saying he was going to be late, as he got into a fender bender. Less than a month ago he was pulled over for running a red light and got a driving without a license as well. Here start the lies. Said he asked the cop and I am quoting here "What the F**k do you want?". Ok, that would be automatic go directly to jail do not pass go. He also said it was a stop sign and the cops were out to get him(like who would want him)! Guess he didn't realize it would be in the paper. Ok, back to today. He walks in with the cell phone glued to his ear as per usual for all day saying "I love you". Poor girl. 4 out of 5 in the office had hoped he was driving. He would go to jail then, no luck there. I happen to be going back to my office from the water fountain when he walked by. I yell to someone else "guess we didn't get lucky today!" she busts out laughing. The other 2 come out of their offices laughing. He gives me a dirty look and slams his door! Hahahaha...my day has started out really well. Hope the rest is this good!